Dogs Gone Wild

July 2012

One afternoon, I passed my black lab Lucy in the family room and noticed she was chewing up some paper. I thought, “Wonder what she has?” Much to my dismay, she had one of my very first pay checks from absolutely! Memorial Magazine.  After I calmed down, and the office staff stopped laughing, I became inspired to find out what other funny things dogs had chewed up or eaten. Here is what you had to say:

Dog: “Joy” Archer
Breed: Bulldog, Terrier and a little Mastiff
Item Eaten: A pepper spray canister

Thrill seeker Joy was in the back of the Archer’s SUV when there was a loud explosion. The vehicle filled with a noxious vapor, causing coughing and wheezing. Luckily, they managed to pull over and all made a full recovery, including Joy.

Dog: “Sierra” St. Martin
Breed: Boxer
Item Eaten: Chocolates

Sierra, now a chocolate connoisseur, discovered the four boxes of chocolates that the St. Martin’s daughter was to deliver for a fund-raiser. She even ate through the plastic wrapper and cardboard box. She spent the night at the ER but was able to come home the next morning.

Dog: “Berkman” Holder
Breed: Black Lab Mix
Item Eaten: The wall

Escape artist Berkman was staying with some friends while his family was out of town. He missed everyone so much that he ate a 20 by 30 inch hole in the sheetrock trying to get back to them.

Dog: “Murphy” Nobles
Breed: Boxer
Item Eaten: Star Wars characters

Murphy’s favorite things to chew are the heads, hands, and feet off of the Murphy twins’ toys. May the force be with you Murphy!

Dog: “Laura” Marion
Breed: Retriever Mix
Item Eaten: Books

Committed to recycling, Laura has long shown an insatiable appetite for literature, literally eating an entire copy of her owner’s treasured Jefferson Bible, a hard cover book.

Dog: “Ginger” Prewett
Breed: Yellow Lab
Item Eaten: One hundred gumballs

In a world record attempt, Ginger ate every single gumball that the Prewett’s youngest daughter had glued onto her 100th day of school poster. The vet suggested giving Ginger several teaspoons of hydrogen peroxide so that she would regurgitate the gum. It worked like a charm.

Dog: “Bailey” Steelman
Breed: Black Lab
Item Eaten: Sand dollars

Craving souvenirs, Bailey ate the sand dollars that the Steelman kids found on a recent snorkeling adventure while vacationing in Florida.

Dog: “Bella” Hamilton
Breed: Boykin Spaniel
Item Eaten: Shoelace

Bella unlaced a tennis shoe and ate the shoelace without chewing it up. It was returned to the Hamiltons all in one piece after Bella digested it.  She is considering trying out for America’s Got Talent.

Dog: “Sierra” Cole
Breed: German Shepherd Mix
Item Eaten: Rotting roots from larger bushes and trees.

An aspiring landscaper, Sierra digs them up and then pulverizes them.

Dog: “Violet” Hampton
Breed: Pug
Item Eaten: Orbit chewing gum

Violet ate eight pieces of Orbit chewing gum, which is poisonous to dogs. Violet had to have her stomach pumped and stayed at the emergency room for 12 hours. Violet is fine, and hopes to continue treasure hunting in designer handbags.

I shared some of your stories with our vet, Dr. Pat Banks. According to Dr. Banks, apparently cats can get into trouble chewing too. Several years ago, a cat came in for treatment because it had eaten a Monopoly game piece. You can probably guess which piece. The x-ray showed it was the dog! “It’s the only time I have ever seen a cat eat a dog whole,” laughed Dr. Banks.

Copyright 2012 Absolutely! Focus Media


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