Your day in peaceful Memorial starts like any other – you are in a hurry. Of course there are five luxury SUVs in line ahead of yours at Starbucks. Delayed by the unusually slow baristas, you show up a few minutes late to your tennis lesson.
You are feeling good about your back hand when you get a text from your child: “My project is on my desk. I need it NOW. PLEASE BRING IT MOM!!!!!”
You put out that fire and take a little time for yourself for a mani/pedi. Those few minutes relieve your stress. Because you are still in a hurry, you don’t spend quite enough time with your nails under that special blue light. So you nick the polish on your big toe getting into your car.
You head to lunch with a few friends and can’t wait to get there and complain about Starbucks, your child and your big toe. All goes well until you get to the drink machine. The Diet Coke dispenser is out of order. What? Really? Why is the world against you? You can’t tolerate the taste or calories in regular Coke, so you have water. You console yourself that it was the healthier choice anyway.
You stop by the monogram store to pick up some birthday gifts. Your order isn’t ready. A string of cuss words flies through your head, but you bite your tongue and say you will come back tomorrow. To help you carry on, you drive through McDonalds for a large Diet Coke.
There seems to be just enough time to pop into Anthropologie and look at that cute dress you saw in the catalog. Of course you can’t really “pop in” because the parking is a nightmare. You can’t find the dress, and the sales girl tells you it is not available in stores, but they can order it. You think about that, but decline because (a) you would have to wait for it which is no fun and (b) you would most likely need to return it and have to park here again. You leave while composing a letter to no one in particular about how stupid it is for stores to offer “internet/catalog only” items.
You get home just in time to greet the kids off the bus. You are now in an even bigger hurry, but your younger child cannot find her left tap shoe, and your older child wants help finding the surface area of a bird house. Seriously? At this exact moment, your dog vomits. You think to yourself, “whose brilliant idea was it to get a dog?” Oh wait. That was you.
Returning from all your carpool duties, you receive a text that your husband won’t be home in time for dinner. The kids beg you to order pizza. “Yes,” you think. “Pizza will be great. There is hope for this day after all.” You dial the number to Reginelli’s and reach into your SubZero for a bottle of crisp Pinot Grigio.